Taglines

• Life without danger is a waste of oxygen.


• Life in a vacuum sucks


• You'll get what's coming to you ... Unless mailed


• Two wrongs are only the beginning.


• You're only young once; you can be immature f'ever.


• As I said before, I never repeat myself.


• A diplomat thinks twice before saying nothing..


• Computer Lie #1: You'll never use all that disk space.


• Don't confuse me with facts, my mind's already made up.


• Don't talk unless you can improve the silence.


• Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.


• I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I'm perfect.


• Just what part of "NO" didn't you understand...?


• hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY?


• Sign on baby's bib: SPIT HAPPENS.


• ASCII a stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!


• A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.


• Girl laid in tomb may soon become mummy..


• I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either.


• There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.


• There are 3 kinds of people in this world...those you want things to happen, those that make things happen, and those who just wonder what the hell happened!


• Frogs have it easy. They can eat what bugs them.


• Where there's smoke, you'll find my wife cooking dinner.


• Join the army! Travel the world, Meet interesting people, and kill them.


• Two rights do not make a wrong. They make an airplane.


• Me, Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.


• I was only looking at your name tag, honest.


• Quick, call a witch doctor! My witch is sick.


• Strip mining prevents forest fires.


• Endless Love: Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles playing tennis.


• KENTUCKY: Five million people, Fifteen last names.


• Jesus saves sinners and redeems them for cash and valuable prizes.The faulty interface lies between the chair and the keyboard.


• Hangover: The wrath of grapes.


• Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!


• Life is Uncertain... Eat dessert first!


• When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.


• Dont hate me because I'm beautiful - hate me because your boyfriend thinks I'm beautiful!


• Having a smoking section in a restaurant is like having a peeing section in a swimming pool.


• You can't scare me. I drive a school bus!


• I've discovered that I often visit the state of confusion, and I know my way around pretty well.


• Smile, everyone loves a moron.


• My family puts the "fun" back in dysFUNctional.


• Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house.


• Ah, yes, divorce......., from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.


• Roses are red, violets are blue, I once thought I was ugly, until I saw you!


• Just because you have one doesn't mean you have to act like one!


• My computer NEVER cras...DOH!.


• Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster!


• You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.


• How does Avon find so many women willing to take orders?


• Looking for a helping hand? There's one on your arm.


• My mind works like lightning... one brilliant flash and it's gone.


• Never trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent.


• Sometimes you're the bug, and sometimes you're the windshield..


• Next time you wave at me, use more than one finger, please!.


• I would like to help you out. Which way did you come in?